Okay, I only went to see this one for the special effects, I admit it. And they were AWESOME. Once. In a big theater with a full sound system.

Kids, don't try this at home, you'll only be disappointed.

So what is wrong with this movie? well, the Mayan calendar does indeed end in 2012. But that's not because the world ends, it's just because that's when the cycle ends. They would have run down to Barnes Ignoble and bought a new one....but no! the fact that their cycle ends AT ALL has spawned a whole lot of stupid end-of-the-world crap (including Aronofsky's The Fountain, and if you know not whereof I speak, consider yourself lucky) rivaling the Y2K stuff in stupidity if not intensity. So why not make a movie of it?

Well, because, as we know from so many idiotic movies that preceded it, unless you have an actual plot and good writing, special effects are just not enough to make this otter happy.

But I have to say, having figured out that it would be STOO-PID and gone solely to see LA destroyed while John Cusack gets his family out (barely) in the nick of time, that part was pretty damn good.

And Woody Harrelson was GREAT as the crazed geologist/survivialist/conspiracy nut in Yellowstone. That was actually the best part of the movie.

The rest? not so much. Didn't care about the plot or characters. At all. And I'm an otter who not only cries when ANYONE in a movie dies, I will even burst into tears during movies I'm not even WATCHING if someone dies. I can't be in the room while Mr. Otter is watching Million Dollar Baby any more.

So this will tell you how lame this movie was, that I not only didn't care about which of the woman's two husbands would come back from swimming through the gears of the door of the giant ship, but I didn't bat an eye when the evil dad tossed his annoying children into the ship so they'd survive while he plunged to his death. Just didn't care.

Yes, I know, this review is awfully late and you are probably not going to get to see it in a theater with the big ol' booming sound system. I'd say skip it, but if you MUST, try to visit a friend who has the best home setup of anyone you know. And don't even LOOK in my direction, I'm not watching this dog twice.